Walking out of the movie “War Dogs” last weekend — It’s an entertaining film, for what it’s worth — I kept thinking about how tired I am of the “Concerned wife/girlfriend who exists only to nag her busy, adventurous husband about how dangerous his job is, and to cry about getting lied to” character tropes. You’ve all seen the movie/read the book.
He’s the protagonist. He does all kinds of interesting things, driving the action. She’s sitting at home, probably taking care of the kid. He lies “to protect her.” Eventually, she realizes it and walks about, typically taking the kid to her mom’s house. He begs and pleads. She considers changing her mind, but she leaves.
Tropes like this drive me crazy, particularly when they’re as obligatory as this one. As I talked to my wife about it, I recalled a quote I’ve seen a few times lately. It says, in effect, “If there’s a story you haven’t seen but want to read, write it.” At that point, I decided that’s exactly what I’m going to do. I’ll have to pick my spot, but that story is happening for me. Mark it down.
That also got me thinking, though. What other common tropes could I flip on their heads? Which other stereotypical cliches of fiction could I find a way to turn inside out? Here are some of the more annoying ones that came to mind:
Damsel in Distress
It’s always the woman who gets held against her will, or in trouble, and the man who sets out to save her. This goes back pretty much forever. It was even the driving force behind video games — we all remember Mario and Luigi trying to save Princess Toadstool from that bastard Bowser. There’s something about playing into those stereotypes of the strong man and weak woman. But there’s no reason this can’t go the other way, and this one’s on my list.
Cute, Quirky Girl and the Straight Man
I remember this one most prominently from movies like “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” and “Garden State,” but it’s insanely common. The love interest of the male protagonist is quirky in some way. Maybe she colors her hair and dances the polka randomly. She smiles a lot, and tries to bring the male protagonist out of his straight-man shell. I think this one plays well with shy guys who like the idea of a cute, quirky girl falling for them.
Disposable Love Interest is a Woman
Whenever you see a love interest disappear from a story without much of any explanation — this tends to happen between movies or books in a series — that love interest is just about always a woman, it seems. The man is too busy with his awesome adventures to worry about her. He can’t settle down; he’s got too much to do. She’s just there as a prop to let him show how manly he is with a sex scene or two. Then, she’s unceremoniously out the door. I’d like to find a good chance to turn this one around.
The Woman is the Wise, Grounded One
This is sort of the flip of the “Quirky, cute girl” one, and is typically framed within a couple. I think this has been an overcorrection from decades of condescending to women, but it’s just as condescending — if not more so. In this trope, the man is forgetful, juvenile, and doesn’t know how to care for the kids. The wife/girlfriend is constantly rolling her eyes at her man’s latest screwup. Advertisers love this one. But actual women know it isn’t true, and it strikes me as patting women on the head to tell them how smart and capable they are. Of course they are. That should go without saying. We don’t need to oversell it to show how not-sexist we are.
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